21 Mar 2018

Sex and feminism -- the unbalanced bedroom

Psychologist and author Sandra Konrad argues that the male perspective still dictates the way women behave in bed. Her research reveals that women often care more about their partners' desires than their own.

Christine Tragler
Christine Tragler Der Standard, Austria
Source: Der Standard
Sex and feminism -- the unbalanced bedroom - NewsMavens
Lips. Wikicommons

Why this story matters:

Sandra Konrad conducted in-depth interviews with over 70 women about their sexual self-determination. Her findings are featured in her recent book, "The Mastered Sex, Why She Wants What He Wants."

Her interviews show that women are concerned with male gaze and male desire, and exhibit deep-seated tendencies to repress certain needs in order not to come across as unattractive.

Konrad also highlights the contradictions of modern sexuality. On one hand women are increasingly ambitious and competitive when it comes to sexual performance, but on the other they gauge their success by attempting to fulfill patriarchal fantasies. Though they talk more openly about sexuality, the MeToo movement showed the degree to which abuse still lurks in the shadows.

In short, two thousand years of male dominance cannot be wiped in one fell swoop. This is going to take time, especially when it comes to sex.

gender, women's issues

Details from the story:

  • Sandra Konrad talked to more than 70 women between the ages of 18 and 45 about sexual self-determination.
  • Today, women still grow up in a world where they would rather please than lead, and where the male gaze matters more than female desire, she says.
  • "That's why women often behave in way that attract men, and unfortunately weaken themselves in doing so. When women defend themselves and rebel against prevalent social norms, they are often perceived as sexually unattractive."
  • Konrad has a PhD in psychology and works in Hamburg as a couple and family therapist. She also writes non-fiction books about relationships ("Making Love") or family dynamics ("Staying in the Family").
inbox_large_illu Created with Sketch.
Tired of the news media’s prevailing male perspective? We are too.

Get our newsletters composed exclusively by female journalists from all over Europe.

WITH FINANCIAL SUPPORT FROM:
SUPPORTED BY:

Project #Femfacts co-financed by European Commission Directorate-General for Communications Networks, Content and Technology as part of the Pilot Project – Media Literacy For All

The information and views set out on this website are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the official opinion of the European Union. Neither the European Union institutions and bodies nor any person acting on their behalf may be held responsible for the use which may be made of the information contained therein.

STRATEGIC PARTNERS:
NewsMavens
NewsMavens is a media start-up within Gazeta Wyborcza, Poland's largest liberal broadsheet published by Agora S.A. NewsMavens is currently financed by Gazeta Wyborcza and Google DNI Fund.
Is something happening in your country that Newsmavens should cover?
CORE TEAM
Zuzanna Ziomecka
Zuzanna Ziomecka EDITOR IN CHIEF
Lea Berriault-Jauvin
Lea Berriault Managing Editor
Jessica Sirotin
Jessica Sirotin EDITOR
Ada Petriczko
Ada Petriczko EDITOR
Gazeta Wyborcza, Agora SA Czerska 8/10 00-732, Warsaw Poland
The e-mail addresses provided above are not intended for recruitment purposes. Messages concerning recruitment will be deleted immediately. Your personal data provided as part of your correspondence with Zuzanna,Lea, Jessica and Ada will be processed for the purpose of resolving the issue you contacted us about. The data provided in your email is controlled by Agora S.A. with its registered office in Warsaw Czerska 8/10 Street (00-732). You can find more information about the processing and protection of your personal data at https://newsmavens.com/transparency-policy
System.Threading.Tasks.Task`1[System.Threading.Tasks.VoidTaskResult];